My marriage to my Soulmate, The Knight of Swords* was in danger of ending. I was in shock. Facing the reality was RAW, like a hunk of meat slapped on the counter.
We had both become addicted to cannabis; it has caused us deep harm. The plant was no longer medicine. Our deep, energetic connection was severed, in a fog.
Still, my heart and soul vibrated with hope and love. I dove into my yoga, spiritual practice.
I kept on with my work; launching my women’s moto gear line, Raven Rova. I kept on riding, swimming, and breathing! In the wee hours of the insomnia filled mornings, yoga nidra meditation, setting my intention and praying kept me going.
I let myself surrender. Repeating, “the truth is, I don’t know what will happen.” Released attachment to our material life. Released aversion to the idea of losing everything.
Surrendered to the unknown, offered up acceptance. I was attached to the idea that love had to look, feel a certain way. When I realized it could be lost in an instant, I felt the insecurity, saw through the fog. I could see the material, physical abundance - but the inner acceptance was lacking. I opened to the generosity of the divine. Felt the abundance all around me.
I let myself become vulnerable, cried into the arms of friends. I took off the leather coat and let my delicate lace show. Accepted help and advice from family, friends, yoga teachers, business advisor, psychologist. While caring for myself, I opened my heart and mind to find the windows of connection. Above all, I dropped my ego.
I knew I had ONE chance to reconnect with my soulmate. This was it.
On a sunny afternoon I was riding home from the art museum, where I had gone for inspiration. I was feeling confident that I would be able to heal my marriage and reconnect. Energy is all around us. I always park next to another cool bike, hoping the rider will appear. Today it was a sick KTM dirt bike, with the same HDB handlebar guards that I had! I had a fun, lively chat with the rider. Ready to ride!
I decided to travel my husband’s route home, literally ride his road. I came up to the first intersection and a Suzuki careened around the corner. Then a man in black on a big Harley-Davidson rolled up next to me. He had the same style bike as my dad, same physique, same boots! We gave each other a nod and a grin, and started to ride. His exuberance and playfulness reminded me of both my dad, and my soulmate. It was a coincidental moment of perfect synergy, which gave me the courage and joy to keep on.
I parted ways with the man in black on the HD. I felt so alive and hopeful. I thought, I could ride around the world solo, but I want my Soulmate with me!
I was approaching “the Laney College jump”
He takes that jump on his Husky Supermoto all the time (sometimes on the FXR…)
Feeling alive, free, confident the road was clear.
I had no fear.
On my Kawasaki KLX, in 3rd gear.
I fired up my core, pounced in a crouch, opened the throttle and FLEW over that jump.
I realized why he took that jump.
THAT was the window of connection which let me breeze back in, like a gentle wind.
In the 72 hours that followed we connected more deeply, and clearly than we had in years. I had felt the generosity of the divine. We shared music, spirituality, struggles and the motor oil pumping through our veins!
There’s a long road of healing ahead, and we just need to look where we want to go.
We’re gonna to get there just fine.
Two wheels move the soul!
This article is part of a series of blog posts for Modern Moto Magazine. In the series, I will be introducing yoga asanas (poses) and pranayama (breath) to help you find and keep your center. Follow Modern Moto's Blog !
Yoga, meditation were pivotal for me to move through this challenge with strength and ease. Helped me keep on riding and living too. Over the few articles I will share more stories and yoga poses to help you find your center; no matter the challenge!
First, here is Uttanasana or “Standing Forward Bend”
Simple and powerful when you need a breather!
You can do this pose just about anywhere.
Soothing the nerves, calming, and inward looking.
Also opens the hamstrings.
Stand with your feet hip-width apart, wiggle your toes and plant the heels, balls, toes of the feet firmly into the earth/floor.
Inhale through your nose, feel the breath down move from your nose up into your crown, and down into your belly.
Exhale, relax your shoulders and imagine you have roots grounding your feet into the earth. Inhale, raise arms overhead.
Exhale and swan-dive forward, fold from the hips. (If you have shoulder pain, omit the arm raise and fold from the hips.) Keep a micro bend in the knees, especially if tight.
Now, relax and let gravity pull you down.
Inhale, Exhale, keep breathing in your own rhythm.
You may find you naturally fold deeper and hang heavier with each exhale.
Hang here for 2 - 6 minutes to start. Up to 10 minutes with regular practice.
Arm Variations; let arms hang loose, hold opposite elbows (switch half way through), or stand on the palms of your hands for a nice hand massage. That’s my favorite, especially after a few days of riding and working with my hands.
Go Deeper: do this with your sit bones (butt) up against the wall. It turns into a more active opener for the hamstrings, and is a fantastic opening posture for any asana practice.
About the Author:
Karleen Eberle is a fashion designer based out of Oakland, CA. She is the CEO of Raven Rova. Karleen has been practicing yoga for over 10 years, and has a 200 hour RYT certification.
Like her writing ? Follow Stories Under the Scorpio Moon on Medium: https://medium.com/@karleeneberle
*The Knight of Swords is the fictitious name of Karleen’s husband. All of Karleen's characters have names from The Tarot.